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Title: Life - Still on Earth. By Jaye Reid Commenced: September 8, 2003 Rating: PG13 Spoilers: Life on Mars - Post ep. Disclaimer: Owned by the brilliant Sorkin and WB. Not mine, never will be. I have no money, therefore I'm not worth suing. Borrowed for my own amusement. Category: Josh/Donna - some Josh angst. Summary: "...men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power." - Abraham Lincoln. Authors Notes: Ah, finally I've had a chance to finish this. Having written the Josh/Hoynes centric fic "Life on Earth," this is a continuation. I've also made a few of my own assumptions following Inaug. II. Thanks again to Aim for pointing out the differences in the American English, compared to Australian English. At least now I know the only type of squash in America is the one you eat not drink <g>. Thanks to Bridget for correcting my basic grammar errors. *** Josh looks up from the computer at the sound of someone at his door. "Hey," he offers with a tired breath. She'd stopped dead in the doorway. Expecting the office to be empty. "Hey. You're back already." "Yeah," Josh sighed, turning back to his computer and offering a few keystrokes before stopping again. "I thought you were going to see the Vice President?" Donna volunteered, now entering the office and dropping into a chair opposite him. "Hmm... yeah, I went to see him," he replied, still staring at the display, with his fingers resting gently on the center row of keys. "I didn't expect you back already. I'm not quite finished going over the reports. I can go get them," she offered, turning her head back towards the door. "No... no, that's... I know. I wasn't gone long so I figured... but..." "Josh, are you okay?" his verbal ineloquence more pronounced than usual. It worried her. "I... I don't know." "Do you want to talk about it?" She doubted he did by the way he looked at her blankly. "I'm not really sure what to say. I didn't know what to say to him. It was like... there was just this... he was just a guy sitting in a bar. It was like I could feel his loneliness - it just... I'm not making any sense here," Josh sighed, scrubbing his face with his hands. "Yes you are." No he wasn't she thought, but maybe if she let him ramble along more, she could pick up a thread of what he was talking about. Josh snorted. "I don't know how you can follow what I'm thinking. Hell... I don't even know what I'm thinking." "I'm fluent in Lyman-speak. Try me." Josh cocked his head to one side and looked at her. "Look, it probably doesn't make sense... but it was like this fog... this fog of loneliness around him. It was suffocating." "Uh huh." "It was just... well, sad." "Sad?" "Yeah, sad. It was... he's just this decent guy who screwed up - but it's going to cost him everything. And he realizes this. He knows he's screwed up, but now... well there's nothing he can do about it." "I understand his political career is not looking good at the moment but..." "Suzanne wants to split." "Oh." "Yeah... she's... and they have two teenage girls." "I've met his daughters and I've spoken to Suzanne Hoynes at functions. She seems nice." "She is." "So they can't work past this?" "If it was me and you were her, would you feel like working past something like this?" "You wouldn't..." "I bet she said that too." "Josh..." "I'm not saying I'm going to go out and have an affair with anyone Donna. I'm just saying... hypothetically..." "Why do you think I left Steven?" "Exactly." "I don't agree with what he did Josh." "Neither do I." "But..." "Yeah. Do you think... do I seem annoyed with him? He thought I was pissed about all of it?" "I wouldn't have said that. Disappointed maybe but not annoyed." "I always wanted what they had, but now..." "You're not John Hoynes, Josh. I'm not concerned." "You have a lot of faith in me. I used to have a lot of faith in him." "Josh... will you stop trying to find a way to blame yourself for everything that goes wrong in the world? You couldn't have predicted this... this isn't your screw up." "I'm the one who has to try and fix it though." "Yes, welcome to the world of the Deputy Chief of Staff," Donna snorted. "I know," he sighed. "Is he going to be okay?" "I don't know... I just hope he doesn't..." "Drink?" Donna questioned softly. Josh viewed her with a mouth-opened surprise. "How did you..." "I don't know. It was... it was little things along the way. Celebrations with soda water. Glances between Leo and the Vice President whenever drinks were offered. Leo was always the first to get him something non-alcoholic before anyone else had a chance to do opposite. I don't know if anyone else really noticed..." "You noticed," Josh replied. "I know... but, I guess I've become accustom to look out for little things that could turn into big things." "You do things I wish you didn't have to," Josh replied with a resigned tone. "I know. Get over it," Donna shrugged good-naturedly. "I'm better now you know. I mean I can't guarantee one day, but you know... today I'm okay." "We need to find another Vice President." "I wasn't finished with the old one." "I know." "We're not going to get much done tonight. Why don't we make a start in the morning?" Josh suggested as he hit save on the document open on the computer. "I still haven't finished the reports, I really should," Donna replied. "Bring them home with you then. We can have dinner and finish them." "As much as that sounds good, we made a deal, remember." "Work stays at work... yeah, we agreed, I thought that just this once..." "I should finish the reports." "Finish them tomorrow." "I..." "I'm your boss. Here I'm your boss. The reports can wait until tomorrow." "Let's go home?" "Yes, home." "It's not your fault Josh," Donna offered as she grabbed his backpack from the corner and his coat. "As much as you feel you have to blame someone, it isn't you." "I know." "Then stop acting as if it is." "I know." "Josh..." "Look, I'm okay. I don't hear Schubert when I close my eyes so I'm doing fine." "You'll tell me though..." "Donna if the orchestra starts to warm up then I'll let you know." "Promise?" "Yes, I promise. Let's go home." And for the first time that day she saw him smile. Finis. |